Sex. Everything does it. It plays the background of all our thoughts like an innocent nymphette in a Catholic schoolgirl uniform with blinking eyelashes. All our actions seem to be focused on doing it as much as possible. Since the dawn of humanity, every culture has been fascinated with our most primordial drive.
We can go two routes: Let’s say the evolutionary biologists have it neatly decoded, and have unraveled all our dirty secrets from our DNA molecules. All our actions are instinctual impulses. pre-determined from our genetic code, and can be reduced to basic neurological energy exchanges that are embedded within all organic substances. Reducing everything we do from brushing our teeth to making money into a byproduct of the primal instinct to procreate and have lots of good sex doesn’t seem very appealing. Whatever happened to consciousness and free will? Whatever happened to love?
Freud agreed and applied evolutionary theory to the workings of our social dynamics. He explained that while we want to get down and dirty, societal constraints (i.e. the Man, religious dogmas, and personal hang-ups) are at constant work to repress our libidinal instincts with socially constructed rules of sexual conduct. This is the basis for all our sexual and psychological neuroses.
Grasping the issue on the spiritual angle, we can look to the ancient yogis and their worship of the sexual energy force known as Tantra. The followers of Tantra date back thousands of years and claim that metaphysical unity and enlightenment can be achieved by respecting the sex act as a sacred ritual.
Every culture throughout history has had their sexual taboos, as well as a ceremonial worship of the most primordial act of life. On a more pragmatic level, sex is something all of us (hopefully) enjoy and practice as often as we can. Therefore, it’s important to hone your skills like a craftsman mastering their trade. There are few pleasures in the world as rewarding as satisfying your partner and reaping the same benefits in return. Sex is something we as a species have done since the dawn of humanity and will practice until we are extinct, so why not become a virtouso of the body and play the ultimate symphony? Here’s a little sampling of ancient, time-tested methods and positions that will help you have sex like a yogi or your favorite rock star.
To get into shape, you have to work out on a consistent and habitual exercise routine to increase your muscle strength and control; sexual fitness is no different. It’s all about the right exercises, and with hard work and dedication, you’ll have the endurance of Sting. The monarch of the sex muscles is the pubococcygeus (pew-boh-cox-uh-jee-us), or the PC muscle. This muscle contracts at the average rate of once every .8 seconds in both sexes during orgasm. Your anal muscle also contracts during, before, and even after orgasm, so don’t forget about your friend, the sphincter.
The contemporary rediscovery of the great value of these muscles for sexual health and pleasure is credited to Los Angeles physician (like he could be from anywhere else) and resident pimp, Arnold Kegel. He developed the legendary Kegel (kay-gill) exercises sometime in the 1950s, while most folks were living in the Leave it Beaver routine. It’s probably no revelation to you that you can exercise your sex muscles. The popularity of Kegel exercises has been well known to most freaks since the early Sixties. But like most Western spiritual discoveries (see Huxley and Jung,) ‘Kegel exercises’ have been effective sexual exercises practiced in China and India for thousands of years.
The ancient experts viewed the human body-mind as a vulnerable silo storing energy with a leaky base, where life energy or chi leaked out. These holes correspond to the urethral opening, the anal opening, and in women, the vaginal opening. It was believed that when these sex muscles were efficiently strengthened through exercise, they sealed the silo and allowed you to tap into an infinite resource of libidinal energy.
These Eastern sexual exercises were developed in cultures that placed less emphasis on the genital orgasm and focused on utilizing the primal energy to tap into the unified One of the cosmos.
Nowadays, sex experts use the development of the PC muscle and other sex muscles as a way to achieve, intensify, prolong, and control genital orgasms in both sexes. Whether your path is toward spiritual enlightenment or just having great sex, practice and dedication can get you a little of both. The key is to develop your muscles and skills, and become an artist of the fine art of lovemaking. The Kegel exercises are not merely crude mechanical gestures that any meat-head can do at home; they are ancient symphonies of the body-mind that lead toward the nirvana of self-generated waves of bliss. These ancient Eastern methods are intended to lead to the awakening of the mystic life force, the arousal of the cosmic lover within, and really beautiful drawn out sex.
Locate your PC muscle- It is located in the same spot in both sexes and stretches from your genitals to the anus resting on the pelvic floor. The standard way to find your PC muscle is to release and contract it during urination by intentionally stopping and starting the process. Do this several times. Women may need to keep their legs open wide, so that the glutial muscles in the ass don't add confusing signals. Another method is to pretend you've got to hold back a big dump, and tighten your anal muscles; be conscious not to use the abdominal muscles to do this. Men should stand in front of a mirror and make their penis moves up and down as they squeeze their PC muscle, which I’m sure many of you do already. Women can delicately place their index and/or middle finger in the vagina and squeeze. The vagina will grasp your fingers, perhaps even quite firmly or possibly even push them out. The PC muscle itself can be felt in the vagina as a ribbed muscle located about one and a half inches in diameter.
Once you have definitely found the PC muscle, begin with quick or short Kegel squeezes. Contract the muscle 20 times at a rate of about one per second, or even faster, counting it as one session. Do two sessions on your first day, careful not to overextend your self. Gradually build your sessions up to 75 squeezes twice a day.
When you can comfortably do 75 quickie Kegel contractions twice a day and you’re feeling confident about your Kegel workout, add sustained or long Kegel movements. Long Kegel squeezes are equally simple; it is merely a matter of holding a sustained muscle contraction for a count of three instead of the usual one count. Start with 20 of these per session for two sessions a day, trying to eventually build up to 75 each session twice a day. Take your time, avoid straining yourself, and focus on your breath, taking inhales through your nose during contraction and exhaling out your mouth upon release. The PC muscle is just like any other muscle, only more important, if you overexert yourself you will become sore.
You may feel a tightening of the muscles in the stomach and thighs at the beginning of your Kegel routines. This is common, but after the first few days or weeks after you've completely isolated the muscle, these extra contractions should be negligible. Remember you can practice your exercise anywhere from a subway to your desk at work, so don’t be shy.
If you’re hardcore and dedicated, you can build up your workout to about 300 reps a day. Like most forms of holistic body maintenance, the Kegel is not a one-time panacea. It requires devotion. Once the PC muscle has been adequately strengthened, a maintenance regime of about 150 per day in a single three-minute session should be more then adequate. Just make sure you have perfected your Kegel exercises to include focused and committed clenches. Focus profoundly on the physical sensations you are experiencing; you may find this easier if you close your eyes.
It is important to learn how to relax between contractions. Without the necessary release separating your muscle contractions, the PC muscle will not grow as quickly. Relaxation is as important to your control as the contractions. If a man learns how to relax these muscles during sexual intercourse, he can last much longer, which is what where all striving for anyway. It may help if you breathe in time with your clenches, or to count out the number of breaths, because you may be holding your breath and not even realize it. This not only aids in maintaining focus and awareness of your PC muscle, but even and long breaths can relax your entire body in a similar fashion to many meditation techniques.
Another variation of the Kegel exercise is known as the bearing down maneuver. After first tightening and then releasing the PC muscle, push down and out gently as if trying to force out bowel movement. This is the same sequence that you will use for sexual arousal and control. You will also feel the action of your abdominal muscles and anus as you bear down. A useful variation is to do sets of reps that team long Kegel clenches with strong push outs. Only go for these maneuvers after you've developed good PC muscle strength -- this is definitely not recommended for rookies.
Don't be surprised if the exercises arouse erotic feelings while you're doing them. What do you think we’re doing here anyway? Whatever your approach, it’s essential to develop your ability to focus attention on your muscles, sensations, and feelings, in order to achieve maximum results and enjoyment. Kegel gurus have been known to feel inundating waves of bliss that have nothing to do with their surrounding environment, or from outside stimulus. They are internally generated and said to be the results of an archetypal awakening of an innate and often repressed pleasure potential.
The benefits of the Kegel exercises are numerous, including getting familiar with your sex organs and erotic feelings, improving the blood flow and circulation to these areas (which are quite healing in itself,) and most importantly having the ability to make your orgasm a voluntary response, and maintaining ejaculation control.
After two months of dedicated practice, you will probably achieve mastery over your PC muscle. You will be aware when your erotic instrument is fine-tuned by the obvious results you’ll see when having sex. You can only maintain good PC muscle tone with occasional workouts. Virtuoso status it is only achieved and maintained by working out weekly, if not daily, and by lots of sex. Use your knowledge wisely.
Now that you’ve mastered your Kegel exercises, it’s time to put them into good use. No other book on how to freak the ill positions has endured as long as Vatasyayana’s legendary book for the supple, the Kama Sutra. Here’s a basic run down of our favorite moves and other interesting facts we all should know. The context of the book is important to consider; it was written in India a long time ago and geared for a predominantly male audience in a patriarchal society. Sound familiar? The language of the book is not intentionally sexist and is a guide for both men and women in the art of lovemaking. I did my best to modernize it without detracting from the original content and style, so read on with caution. Many of the positions are intended for daily practitioners of Yoga and require both partners to be amply flexible and supple, so don’t be surprised if you can’t bust all the moves. Please don’t let that stop you from getting freaky with it. When we’re in a sexual situation with the adrenaline glands pumping, the body is a lot more willing to accommodate positions you wouldn’t otherwise think of. Check out the actual book for a comprehensive description of all the positions. Kids, please try this at home: Check www.kamasutrafree.com for visuals.
The Flower in Bloom ‘Utphallaka’-The women draws up both her knees until they nuzzle the curves of her breasts; where her feet find her lover's armpits. Small girls love this posture. She cups and lifts her buttocks with her palms, spreads wide her thighs, and digs in her heels besides her hips, while you caress her breasts.
The Flag of Cupid "Madandhvaja"- Grasping the ankles of a round hipped woman, raise her thighs and spread the thigh-joints widely.
Approach her with your body stiff as a pole and drive straightforward to pierce her lotus and join your limbs.
Aphrodite’s Delight "Ratisundara"- Catch hold of her two feet, raising them until they press upon her breasts and her legs form a rough circle. Clasp her neck and make love to her.
The Monkey "Markata"-The woman rests on the bed grasping her ankles and raising high her lotus feet; you strike her to the root, kissing and slapping open-palmed between her breasts.
Dear to Cupid "Manmathpriya"- She lies flat on her back, you sit between her parted knees, raise them, hook her feet over your thighs, catch hold of her breasts, and enjoy.
If your penis is too small for a woman, the "Samputa" group of postures should be used:
"Samputa" The Jewel Case and "Pidita" The Squeeze.
In Samputa your legs lie along hers caressing their whole length from toes to thighs. Your lover may be below you, or you may both lie on your sides, in which case she should always be on your left. In Pidita the lovers' thighs are interlaced and squeeze each other in rhythm.
When lovers, with legs stretched rigid and feet caressing feet, make love according to their hearts' desire, tantra scholars call it "Sampada" or Equal Feet and agree it is a way to ecstasy.
The Rustic "Gramya"-When she lies on her back with her two thighs pressed tightly together and you make love to her, keeping your thighs outside hers.
The Bud "Mukula" She draws her limbs together, clasping her knees tightly to her breasts, her yoni, like an opening bud, offered up for pleasure.
The Couch "Shankha"-When she draws up her knees and you clamp yours about her raised thighs, trapping them in a tight knot while riding saddle upon her buttocks and kissing her.
Seated, mouth to mouth, arms against arms, thighs against thighs:
this is The Tortoise "Kaurma." If the lovers' thighs, still joined, are raised, it is Turning "Paravartita."
The Swing "Dolita" Sitting face to face in bed,
her breasts pressed tight against your chest, let each of you lock heels behind the other's waist, and lean back clasping one another's wrists. Now, set the swing gently in motion, your beloved, in pretended fear, clinging to your body with her flawless limbs, cooing and moaning with pleasure.
The Peacock "Mayura"-Seated, the lady raises one foot to point vertically over her head and steadies it with her hands, offering up her "yoni" for lovemaking.
The Lotus "Padma"- If, sitting facing her, you grasp her ankles and fasten them like a chain behind your neck, and she grips her toes as you make love, it is delightful.
The Milch Cow "Dhenuka"- She bends well forward and grips the bedstead, her buttocks raised high; cup your hands to serpents' hoods and squeeze her jar-shaped (sic) breasts together.
If you mount her like a dog, gripping her waist, and she twists around to gaze into your face, experts in the art of love say it is The Dog "Svanaka."
If the lady, eager for love, goes on all fours, humping her back like a doe, and you enjoy her from behind, rutting as though you'd lost all human nature, it is The Deer "Hirana."
If she lies on her stomach and you seize her ankles in one hand, lift them high and make love, tilting her chin back with your other hand, it is The Cat "Marjara."
She lies on her front, grasping her ankles in her own hands
and pulling them up behind her: this difficult posture is known to experts as The Wrestler "Mallaka."
You lift her ankles high; she draws up and extends her legs as though she were crawling through the air: this is The Elephant "Hastika."
She stands on palms and feet; you stand behind her and lift one of her feet to your shoulder, enjoying the lovely girl: this is The Stride "aivikrama."
Seize her feet and lift them high (like a wheel barrow), rive your penis into her yoni and pleasure her with vigorous strokes:
this is The Thunderbolt "Kulisha."
You kneel, as in archery, take her on your lap and bend her forward till her breasts are pressed to her thighs: this is One Knot "Ekabandha."
Suspended "Avalambitaka."- When the woman sits in her lover's cradled hands, her arms around his neck, highs gripping his waist,
her feet pushing back and forth against a wall.
The Swing II "Dola"- If, as you lean against the wall, your lady twines her thighs around yours, locks her feet to your knees, and clasps your neck, making love very passionately.
The Tripod "Tripadam"-If you catch one of her knees firmly in your hand and stand making love with her while her hands explore and caress your body.
Two Palms "Dvitala"- If you lean back to a wall and your lover, clinging to your neck, places both her feet in your palms and thus makes love.
The Knee Elbow "Janukurpara"- If you lift your lover by passing your elbows under her knees and gripping her buttocks while she hangs fearfully from your neck. Never try it with heavy girls.
Touching "Nimitta"- When your lover catches your penis in her hand and, shaping her lips to an 'O', lays them lightly to its tip, moving her head in tiny circles.
Biting at the Sides- "Parshvatoddashta"- Next, grasping its head in her hand, she clamps her lips tightly about the shaft, first on one side then the other, taking great care that her teeth don't hurt you.
The Outer Pincers "Bahiha-samdansha"- Now she takes the head of your penis gently between her lips, by turns pressing, kissing it tenderly and pulling at its soft skin.
The Inner Pincers "Antaha —samdansha"- Next she allows the head to slide completely into her mouth and presses the shaft firmly between her lips, holding a moment before pulling away.
Sucking a Mango "Amrachushita"- Now, fired by passion, she takes your penis deep into her mouth, pulling upon it and sucking as vigorously as though she were stripping clean a mango-stone.
Swallowed Whole "Sangara" - When she senses that your orgasm
is imminent she swallows up the whole penis, sucking and working upon it with lips and tongue until you spend.
The Quvering Kiss "Adhara-sphuritam"- With delicate fingertips, pinch the arched lips of her house of love very slowly together, and kiss them as though you kissed her lower lip.
The Tongue Massage "Jihva-mardita"- Let your tongue rest for a moment in the archway to the flower-bowed Lord's temple before entering to worship vigorously, causing her seed to flow.
Sucked "Cucshita"- Next, fasten your lips to hers
and take deep kisses from this lovely one, your beloved, nibbling at her and sucking hard at her clitoris.
Sucked Hard "Bahuchusita"- Place your darling on a couch,
set her feet to your shoulders, clasp her waist, suck hard and let your tongue stir her overflowing love-temple.
During lovemaking, ten types of blows may be struck with the penis, but of these only The Natural "Upasripta," which is instinctive even to untutored cowherds, results in full clitoral stimulation. It is a gentle forward stroke which may be varied for depth and speed, allowing a subtlety, rhythm and spontaneity which the other nine each lack to some degree.
If you grasp your penis and move it in circles inside her yoni, it is "Manthana" or Churning. When you strike sharply down into the yoni, it is "Hula" The Double-edged Knife.
When her hips are raised by a pillow, you strike a rising blow, it is "Avamardana" or Rubbing. If you hold your penis pressed breathlessly to her womb it is "Piditaka" The Pressing.
If you withdraw completely and then strike her violently to the womb, it is "Nirghata" The Buffet. Continuous pressure on one side of her yoni is "Varahaghata" The Boar's Blow.
If you thrust wildly in every direction, like a bull tossing its horns, it is "Vrishaghata" The Bull's Blow. Quivering in her yoni is "Chatakavilasa" Sparrow Sport, which usually heralds orgasm. The involuntary shuddering of orgasm is called "Samputa" The Jewel Case. But no two women make love quite the same way, so orchestrate your rhythms to the moods and colors of each lover's "raga" (emotions).
When she takes the man's role, your lady has the choice of numerous famous lovemaking techniques:
The Tongs "Samdamsha"-She uses the Mare's Trick, gripping your penis with her yoni's vice, squeezing and stroking it, holding it inside her for a hundred heart-beats.
The Bee "Bhramara"-Drawing up her feet, she revolves her hips so that your penis circles deep within her yoni, you arching your body to help her.
The Swing III "Prenkholita"-If she now swings her hip in wide circles and makes figures-of-eight, swaying upon your body as though she were riding on a seesaw.
Lovely Lady in Control "Charunarikshita"-Catching your penis, she
guides it into her yoni, clings to you and shakes her buttocks.
The Swan "Hansabandha"- She sits upright upon you, her head thrown back like a rearing mare, bringing her feet together on the bed to one side of your body.
Swan Sport- "Hansa-lila"- If she strides you, facing your feet,
brings both her feet up to your thighs, and works her hips frantically.
The Bull "Virsha"- If you lie flat on your back with legs stretched out
and your lover sits astride you, facing away and grasping your feet.
The Coitus of the Gods "Devabandha" - Clasping each other's hands,you lie sprawled like two starfish making love, her breasts stabbing your chest, her thighs stretched out along yours.
The Orissan "Utklita"- If, by means of some contraption, your lover suspends herself above you, places your linga in her yoni and pulleys herself up and down upon it.
To Enslave a Lover:
Anoint your penis, before lovemaking, with honey into which you have powdered black pepper, long pepper and "datura" (the green thorn apple) - it will utterly devastate your lady. Leaves caught as they fall from trees and powdered with peacock-bone and fragments of a corpse's winding-sheet will, when dusted lightly on the penis, bewitch any woman living. If you crush milky chunks of cactus with sulfur and realgar, dry the mixture seven times, powder it
and apply it to your penis, you'll satisfy the most demanding lover.
And if, to these powerful ingredients, you add a monkey's turd, grind them together and sprinkle the powder on your unsuspecting lover's head, she will be your devoted slave for life.
To Increase Potency:
Honey-sweetened milk in which the testicles of a ram or a goat have been simmered has the effect, when drunk, of making a man as powerful as a bull. Pumpkinseeds ground with almonds and sugarcane root, or with cowhage root and strips of bamboo, and stirred into honeyed milk, have the same arousing effect. The yolk of a single sparrow's egg stirred into rice pudding that has been thickened with cream, wild-honey and "ghee" (clarified butter)
has the same invigorating effect.
To Cope With Impotence:
A man who climaxes too swiftly should arouse his lady by caressing her clitoris with his fingers and flooding the well of her yoni before he enters her. The man who is utterly unable to achieve an erection should pleasure his wife/lover with a phallus crafted from materials like gold, silver, copper, iron (!!), ivory or horn. The artificial phallus should be shaped to your natural proportions. It will be more arousing for the lady if the outside is studded with a profusion of large, smooth nodules.